When it’s been gone for a long time, and revisits – you don’t quite recognize it at first. Lethargy, irritability, crying spells. Then it comes on like a long-lost pal and smacks you right in the face. Hard. Really Hard. It takes control and doesn’t want to let go. The darkness in some moments is overwhelming. Depression has nothing to do with all the little blessings running around. It has everything to do with your brain. Depression doesn’t discriminate. Well maybe it does. A little. Because in good times it doesn’t come as often. But this time boy did it walk right in. Genetics is a huge part of my depression. It runs in the family.
It sucks to be predisposed for such an evil reaper. It really does. Those little blessings are where I look in those dark moments to help me climb out. Maybe that’s why they are here.